Far from reality

This would probably be my shortest post.

I had just dumped my pile of un-ironed clothes back in the pail. Just because. I had spent the last 2 hours and 40 minutes ironing half of them, laundry from two weeks ago – maybe more. I’ll continue tomorrow.

I could have just finished it tonight of course (it’s 00:41 mind you…) but I just had to get this out of my system. I needed to write and it was once my outlet – of happiness, bitterness and anger. Once – because it was suppressed and I was not allowed to have feelings, emotions.

But nevermind that. I would like to talk about something else…

I always knew I would be a housewife. Growing up, I always envisioned a perfect household: a helpful husband, several obedient kids who would help with house chores, a cozy home which smelt of clean laundry and freshly baked bread.

Today, my perfect dream is far from reality… I am a housewife, yes, but I have a messy home, a husband who prefers to be on his phone, one child and laundry that clearly needs ironing.

Don’t get me wrong. I am grateful to God for so many things: a roof over my head, a husband who can support his family, Daniel the smarty pants. But you would always wish you could have so much more: help, safety, loyalty, comfort, love, assurance…

Sometimes I do still wish I had a domestic helper, minus all the drama that comes with it. Sometimes I wish my near-adult stepdaughter could just put things back where they belong. Sometimes I wish the husband would help me with chores without the need of a reminder or nagging.

Sometimes you just need to see into reality. Not everything will work out as planned, or appear as perfect as the picture you painted in your childhood. Sometimes you just have to grow up and move on. Sometimes you just need to take a step back and put your trust in God’s plan.

IMG_0450

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: